This is why we should keep our promises

I've realized that I have shaken my fists towards the heavens in rage and frustration more in the last three days than I probably have in the rest of my life put together.

The reason is simple. I have been reading the Twilight series. My frustration is partial from the book itself and mostly my disgust at myself for reading them.

The first time I so much as heard of the books, my friend was reading them and made me promise that I never would. "I know you," she said, "you will read them all and you will hate them, but you will not be able to stop. Just like me. Spare yourself." I agreed happily enough because I am usually very picky with what I read.

Then due to a series of technical glitches on a trans-Atlantic flight, I accidentally watched the movie. I am sad, although not at all surprised, to report that I really liked it. Well, hated it. But LOVED it. I'm a complicated person. But it became clear to me: I HAD to read the books.

I said to myself, "Why am I being such a literary snob? Is that the type of person I want to be? Many, many people read and enjoy these books. Do I think I'm better than them?" A sensible enough thought, except I forgot to take into account two things about myself: 1) my strong dislike of badly written dialogue etc 2) my addictive personality which makes me easily obsessive over things.

Now I've read 1 and half of the books in three days. I have the third one in my purse ready to go as soon as it's needed. My laundry will have to wait. I'm busy torturing myself with these books that I hate to love. At least I can read until 3am and still get 6 hours of sleep before going to work.

Why, WHY do I do this to myself? I figure it's like a band-aid--I just need to rip it off quick and be done with it. Maybe I'll be able to finish the series in a week and get on with my life.